You should see my decoupage...

Today I saw an unusually large bucket of cottage cheese while I was walking through the basement. I don't want to to know why it was there, who bought it, or what might have actually been in it. I just know that I hate these engineers.

Yesterday, I had to play movie quote dictionary for two of them. They kept coming up with stuff I hadn't seen. Like Team America. Look, I like puppet sex as much as the next person [which is to say "Not at all!"] but the part where the puppet kept puking? Gross, no thank you.

More How I Met Your Mother last night after picking up toothpaste and Starbucks. I really can't get enough of Barney's depravity. Honestly though? If I lived in New York City? I'd probably be just as creative as him in getting people into bed. Fortunately I'm a girl. And girls don't have to work for it.

I'm seeing Empires for the first time this weekend. If the world continues spinning like I think it will, it'll be one of my last chances to see them in a tiny-ass club. Also, I can't take anybody seriously today.

Family Guy Quote of the Day: Sorry, Kids. Daddy loves you, but Daddy also loves TV, and TV was here first.